Me and Religion

I have a postulate and an example. The example came first so I'll tell it first: When I was a boy I absorbed, from church, the notion that there was everlasting suffering in Hell for individuals, for wrongs committed in a finite lifespan. That is the start of my example.

I cannot prove such things one way or the other. One can apply logic, but that does not suffice to resolve such an enormous issue. After all, there could be a God which can do anything and which we mere humans cannot fathom. So I do what I can: I apply logic, and I can have a faith. Logic tells me that it doesn't make sense that there would be everlasting suffering for a person as a consequence of whatever he or she did in a finite lifespan. Logic also indicates to me that a God worth caring about is not petty nor maliciously tricky.

Logic can only take you so far, but not all the way into the religious issues. Part of what we are is faith. My faith is simple and sturdy. It is that "The All Is Not Bad". (That's my postulate, axiom, and faith.) The All (the universe and everything in it, including whatever God or Gods may be in it, and in all its dimensions including time and emotion), altogether in its net effect, is not horrible, not maliciously governed, not an eternity of suffering for most well-meaning people; rather, it (the All) is at least benignly neutral, or possibly "good".

That's my faith. I cannot prove it is true, but that's how all faiths are: not provable. My faith is that being sensible and well-meaning is good, and that the supreme God over all, if one exists, is not going to punish us for being sensible and well-meaning.

Some people think that a lack of reverence for their God implies a wanton, careless, and bad life. I don't see it that way. I don't say I have a "reverence for God"; rather, I am more inclined to say I am trying to hold onto what is good, important, and lasting. My lack of religious-speak does not imply any shallowness.

Some people think the question of whether God exists or not is the First Big Question that has to be answered, and that everything else depends on how it is answered. But I say, it is not the main issue. I say, yes God exists, though I don't know exactly what that means and am not much concerned over exactly what it means; but more importantly, The All Is Not Bad, whether God is in it or not. Believing as I do that the All is not bad, I have hope for myself and for everybody, and I can believe that each suffering will come to an end, and that aspirations can be fulfilled. I can believe that whatever we really need can be obtained. I can believe, for example, that if it matters, then a loving God exists.

But if I did not believe that the All is not bad -- if I believed that the All might be bad -- if I believed, as many people have been taught in churches to believe, that a Supreme God would impose a horrible everlasting punishment for a finite sinful life, then I would not have much hope, and could fear, but not love, such a mean God. And I _would_ fear and obey such a God, if I were sure that was how things really are. But I can never be sure of that, and it may be that that kind of belief would be the wrong path -- the path that the real God disapproves of and hates.

I live, or try to live, my little mortal life in such a way that I have no major moral regrets. If it turns out that my faith is wrong, and it turns out that I'll go to Hell, I won't have any good reason to feel guilty about it. I will have tried to be a decent person and live as I suppose the real God would approve. (I won't be anywhere near perfect -- but the real God, as I believe him/her/it to be, respects reasonable efforts.) I could be wrong, and thus I might be a victim of a petty malicious God that tricked me by giving me a brain to be logical with; but if that is so, then its opposite might as easily be so, and any other statement might as easily be so -- one can never be sure that one small tricky God in particular is the real Supreme Being Over All.

April 23, 2010, 10pm, home alone

I am at home alone, the house-cleaners left, and I already took the kids' stuff to them. They are at their mom's house for a few days.

Tomorrow I can't work much because the computers I would need are down. In the evening I'll go to the Arab American Cultural Center for the first time, and get a copy of the book "Mornings in Jenin" which according to a reviewer is an easy and exciting read. Why not. I can't work because the computers are down. And it's the weekend so I might read a book.

I will also get some exercise. I had planned on training for a marathon but that plan has changed. Now I am training to walk a half-marathon. I know I can do that because I did it several times when I was younger, but back then I didn't call it a half-marathon; it was just walking to Blackwell, and back home later the same day, and that was as far as two half-marathons. With a little care and and a few months of training, I should be able to walk a half-marathon now even if I am 56 years old. The other exercise I'll do, tomorrow, is lifting light weights at the gym. I've been doing that fairly regularly for a couple of weeks. It hasn't made any noticeable difference, except that I feel better.